This is something I would have never guessed. I know that some animals like to get their buzz on. I've seen birds in my neighborhood eat the inedible-for-human berries that grow on some bushes and then flit about in a stoned out state. But when it comes to wallabies, I just assumed these level headed marsupials knew better than to get high and cause mischief. I was wrong.
These violent, antisocial hooligans get doped up old school--eating poppies straight off the flower and then go about vandalizing nature with reckless abandon. Goddamn you, you freaked out stoner wallabies, Goddamn you indeed!
from the Beeb online:
'Stoned wallabies make crop circles'
Australian wallabies are eating opium poppies and creating crop circles as they hop around "as high as a kite", a government official has said.
Lara Giddings, the attorney general for the island state of Tasmania, said the kangaroo-like marsupials were getting into poppy fields grown for medicine.
[...snip...]
Australia supplies about 50% of the world's legally-grown opium used to make morphine and other painkillers.
"The one interesting bit that I found recently in one of my briefs on the poppy industry was that we have a problem with wallabies entering poppy fields, getting as high as a kite and going around in circles," Lara Giddings told the hearing.
"Then they crash," she added. "We see crop circles in the poppy industry from wallabies that are high."
I fear this is only the tip of the iceberg. Marsupials on poppies may be humorous at first glance, but what happens when these vicious hoppers start developing a tolerance for raw opiates? This could be their gateway drug to the hard stuff--cocoa beans, cannibus, ecstasy. When will the madness end?
No comments:
Post a Comment